Odd Things Make Me Laugh

I am a child of technology. As I was growing up I had an Atari, a Nintendo, a computer in my house since they became reasonably affordable, and the first thing I did when I got a computer was beg for a modem. Since then, in some way or another, I have been online. One thing I have always found interesting about technology, and specifically being online or the internet, is the terms that get used by the media and by business marketers that rarely if ever get used by the actual users. The big one for me is “Cyberspace”. The only time I have ever used that term has been in a mocking manner, usually when talking about horrid movies like “Hackers” where getting into a computer system is depicted as travelling through a three dimensional flight simulator, as opposed to reality where most hacking is done in code or on the command line. But command lines aren’t sexy.

However, if you have been on the internet or paid attention to it at all you have heard the term “Cybersex”. If you do not know what that is, well, its kind of like phone sex but with typing. Anyhow, with the ongoing need for people with crappy typing skills to shorten everything, cybersex has long since been just referred to as “cybering” or “cyber”. You’ll see this in online games, again, largely in a mocking tone, because people who are serious about it generally do not talk in public about doing it.

This leads us to my work… The IT staff at my current job location are called “The Cyber Team”. So, every time I call them with a problem concerning my PC or a server I’m using, they answer the phone “Cyber Team, this is [insert name], how can I help you today?” and I start to laugh and want to answer with something like “I lick your earlobe, and undo your watch.” It is a fight to get through the call, then I have to take the elevator down twenty-two floors, step out through security and exit the building where I can finally unleash with the gut rending laughter.

Do they not realize what “cyber” has come to mean? Damn them!