SHOCKtober 2012 – Day 12: Shivers (1975)

I’m just going to come right out and say the best thing about Shivers is that it was David Cronenberg’s first feature directing gig and he would go on to make incredible movies like The Dead Zone, The Fly and so much more. Shivers, on the other hand, is fairly terrible.

Oh, I suppose there is some sort of subtext here about the dangers of promiscuity. I mean, the movie opens with a juxtaposition of scenes, a young couple looking to move into the swank building and inside the building James Lipton of Inside the Actor’s Studio is raping and killing a school girl. It turns out that James, or rather Dr. Emil Hobbes, is part of a team working on using parasites as organ replacements, or something. Anyway, he’s been testing it on this girl, who it turns out is very popular among the other tenants. James Emil has discovered that the parasite is winning or taking over, so he isn’t really killing her but killing the parasite. Her sleeping around has passed the parasite on to others, and before long we’ve got an outbreak.

People die, sometimes grossly, and others are just hosts for parasites, such as the one that crawls into a bathing woman’s vajayjay.

Despite all that, the acting is bad and the special effects often look… well… special. Imagine that the second time I wrote “special” is was done in a very condescending and yet gentle manner.

Look, they can’t all be winners, and Cronenberg has plenty of those, this just isn’t one. If for some reason you feel like tracking down a copy to watch, you might find it under one of its alternate titles: The Parasite Murders, They Came from Within, or Frissons.

Be sure to keep an eye on Final Girl and the rest of SHOCKtober.

UPDATE: Check out other participants – Blog @ Rotten Cotton, Life Between Frames, Money and a Half

SHOCKtober 2012 – Day 6: Slither (2006)

There is a long tradition in horror films of things falling to Earth from space and unleashing monsters upon the populace. In Slither, it’s a meteor. The monster inside gets into a local who then proceeds to kill a bunch of small animals, impregnates a lady who isn’t his wife and moves up to killing livestock to keep her fed, all while slowly turning into a giant slug. The pregnant lady… um… gives birth, in a manner of speaking, and her little slug babies head into town to begin taking over hosts.

At this point, the movie becomes a sort of pseudo-zombie movie as the infected… infested people stumble around town trying to get everyone else, either to put a slug in them or to eat them. The town sheriff, played by Nathan Fillion, and a few survivors fight to save humanity.

Like all movies of this sort, it’s a fun romp and a little gross, but it’s not torture and it’s not happening to me. Besides, I like to imagine that I would be on the side of the survivors, not the slugs. I mean, nobody wants to be a slug, but in order for me to be a hero some of you are just going to have to be slugs. I’m sorry.

Is it wrong for me to say that I’ve seen enough movies that I feel like in real life if a friend or family member were to have, for example, just had a slug enter their mouth and now they are acting a little weird, I’m pretty sure there would be little to no hesitation from me in going on the offensive? I’ve tried to explain to people I know, “Hey, look, if the zombie apocalypse comes, you don’t have to worry that you’ll be shambling around for all eternity, because if you turn anywhere near me, I’ll put you down.” They seem to take it wrong, like I want to kill them or something, they get upset and say things like “But what if it’s curable?” And I’m like, “It’s never curable.” “But what if it was?” I’ll put a hand on their shoulder, give in a comforting squeeze and say, “Well, sometimes, some people just have to take one for the team, you know, just to be safe.”

I think I understand why it is that I don’t have more friends…

Be sure to keep an eye on Final Girl and the rest of SHOCKtober.

UPDATE: Check out other participants – Blog @ Rotten Cotton, Life Between Frames, Money and a Half, nijomu, Final Girl