Tag Archive for street

Gangsta Scouts

I’m riding MARTA minding my own business when three young African-American males board the train. These men were garbed in traditional “street” attire: pants hanging low, shoes with the laces out, Starter jackets, baseball caps on at angles other than forward or backward. One sat and two stood. And then, they spoke:

Gangsta_1: Yo dawg! Check it. I gotta get home an’ get me some of them cookies, yo!
Gangsta_2: What kind you got?
G1: I got me some thin mints just chilling in the freezer waitin’ for me, yo.
G2: Yeah.. thin mints are da bomb yo. But I didn’t get none this time round.
G1: What you get, dawg?
G2: Listen to this, yo. I got me a couple of boxes of Do-Si-Dos.
Gangsta_3: Man, them peanut butter cookies are good. Damn good.
G2: I know, yo. I gots to find me a way to order more.
G3: I think my sister has some friends who be sellin’ cookies still.
G1: Get some thin mints, yo. And Tagalongs. That shit is crazy good!
G2: Damn, I forgot about them. Shit, I think I could eat nuthin’ but Girl Scout Cookies.
G3: True dat.
G1: No doubt.

The doors opened at the next station and the three young men left, and as they did, one of them said, “Man, I’m hungry now, yo. I don’t think I can wait until my lunch break to eat my cupcakes.”

As the train pulled away from the station, most of the passengers, me included, burst into laughter.

World’s Worst Fortune

So last night we ordered chinese, General Tso’s Chicken as usual from the place across the street. It was good, as usual. And after the meal, I opened my fortune cookie.

Promote literacy. Buy a box of fortune cookies today.

Wow… Not a fortune, but an advertizement. I fear for what this might be an omen of…

Hey You!

Yeah you! The one with his car right smack in the middle of the intersection blocking traffic trying very hard to not look left or right to see the faces of the angry drivers. Don’t get me wrong, man, I feel your pain. The traffic is slow and you have somewhere to be. But you know what? Part of the reason the traffic going your way is so slow is that down the road some other jerk-off from a cross street is blocking the intersection. When you come to an intersection that is a four-way stop or a traffic light, if traffic is flowing sporadically or barely at all, its best to wait on one side of the intersection until there is enough space or movement to allow your vehicle to make it all the way across. Not only is it courteous, but especially in messy weather, you not blocking traffic can save lives! That’s right. If you are blocking the way when an ambulance, fire truck or police car comes by sirens blaring, they’ll have to slow way down and drive around YOU! Those precious seconds could mean death for someone else. So quit being an ass and stop being part of the problem.