The Advertising Twist

Assassin’s Creed has been out long enough that I don’t feel any remorse discussing the game.  If you haven’t played it and you have managed to learn nothing about the game, then please stop reading.

When the game first came out, people I knew who played it kept talking about “the twist”.  So, when I finally got the game, in October as a birthday gift, I jumped in and started playing.  As the story unfolded, as it drew me in, I kept looking for the twist… but there never was one.  In fact, I was kind of startled when the game ended because I was still waiting for the twist.

I went looking.  Did I miss it?  Was there an alternate ending that I didn’t get because of some tiny detail I missed in the game?

What I found was that “the twist” wasn’t in the game.  It existed only in the space between the advertising and the moment you booted up the game.  Well, not exactly the moment you booted it up… you had to get through the first tutorial mission type thing and exit the animus once.  Of course, even before then you could see the “glitches”, flags with a glow around them that looked like computer code, people who flicker during dialog.  The twist of Assassin’s Creed was that the advertisements made the game look to be about you as an assassin in the past, but the reality of the game is that you are in the present (or maybe the future) and you are reliving genetic memories of one of your ancestors through the use of a machine in an effort to help some people find out some information.

I really hate when games, or anything really, does this.  Its like when the trailer for a movie makes it out to be a slapstick comedy, but it turns out that all the funny bits were in the trailer and the movie is actually a tragic tale about cancer or suicide with occasional humorous scenes.

As for Assassin’s Creed… I enjoyed playing it.  Climbing all over the city and performing the tasks, I even enjoyed looking for the flags (still haven’t found them all), but I didn’t like the end of the game.  I was waiting for the twist, and in the final moments of the game nothing happened.  Not just no twist, but the story of the game, which had been great until then, had no ending, it just sort of petered out.  I uncovered the conspiracy, found the bad guy in the past which let my future overlords find the information they wanted, and then they walked out of the room, into what I have to assume is going to be Assassin’s Creed 2.

Lame.

I don’t mind sequels.  Telling another story with the same people in the same world can be good.  But breaking one story into two (or more) games is irritating.  I enjoyed Assassin’s Creed, but I’m glad now that I didn’t buy it when it came out, and I won’t be buying the sequel when it comes out.  I’ll be waiting for the discount racks again.

The Strangers

11 out of 13 nots
for being actually scary instead of just bloody shocking

The creepiest line in the film is spoiled in the trailer, and yet is no less effective when delivered.  One of the victims asks of their tormentors, “Why are you doing this to us?” and one of the masked people responds, “Because you were home.”

The idea that simply answering your door at four in the morning could be the trigger for some psycho to kill you is… unlikely, yet scary.

I’m not going to spoil any of the film, because it was truly scary in a way that most recent “horror films” are not.  Most recent films just try to shock you with blood and violence and torture.  So, go see this film, and be ready for a few good jumps.

The guys at DICE get it

While my wife may lament the exclusion of female character models in the upcoming Battlefield Heroes, I can’t wait to give it a shot.  This video trailer for the game just shows me that the guys at DICE really do get it.  To have a great game you don’t need gritty realism with guts spraying the walls with every gunshot, you just need to have a game that is fun.

Damn that looks like fun.

Death at a Funeral

The wife and I decided to hit the theater this weekend, and after making her go see a bunch of action flicks she was overdue for picking the film. She narrowed it down to Death at a Funeral and I Now Pronounce You Chuck And Larry. Since I wasn’t in the mood for Adam Sandler, we went with Death at a Funeral.

I’d seen a trailer before and knew it was about funny things happening at a funeral, but to be honest I hadn’t really 100% paid attention to the trailer. If I’d known it was a) British and b) directed by Frank Oz, I’d have been more excited. Upon the movie starting and discovering both a and b, I settled in for a good comedy.

And it delivered… from the funeral home delivering the wrong body to the service to the… well, I don’t want to give away everything. It was great fun, completely worth the price of admission.

Smokin` Aces

In case you haven’t seen a trailer that actually explains it, here is the short version: Buddy “Aces” Israel was a Las Vegas magician who turned mobster. Buddy causes a split in the Vegas mob with him running one side and Primo Sperazza on the other. Primo is sick and he’s ordered the death of Buddy. Buddy is in the process of turning Federal witness against the whole West Coast mob families. A couple of Primo’s guys decide they want to make sure Buddy dies (or maybe they just want to be the guys who do it) so they hire a few more hitmen to go after Buddy too. Oh, and some bail bondsmen guys are after Buddy for jumping bail. The Feds learn about the hit and hightail it to Lake Tahoe where Buddy is hiding to try to protect him, meanwhile the hitmen all decend on Tahoe as well.

There is alot of set up for the first part of the moive, introducing each of the hitmen (or hitwomen in the case of Alicia Keys and Taraji P. Henson), all the Feds and giving some background on Primo Sperazza, Buddy “Aces” Israel and the case against the mob. The characters and the actors (including Ryan Reynolds, Ray Liotta, Jeremy Piven, Andy Garcia, Jason Bateman, Ben Affleck, Peter Berg, Tommy Flanagan, Curtis Armstrong, Matthew Fox, and more) make the movie… and when the shooting starts, the action ain’t half bad either.

All in all, this was a great fun movie. I recommend it, though it is a bit bloody, so it is not the best date movie and absolutely not for kids.