Movie Round-Up: December 10th, 2010

The Narnian Tourist: The Voyage of the Dawn TreaderThe Tourist: (official site)

It might be just me, but I’ve been kinda over Angelina Jolie for quite some time.  I have seen movies of hers that I enjoy and even that I find her work perfectly fine, but she just isn’t a draw.  I won’t go see a movie just because she’s in it.  Johnny Depp, on the other hand, I’ll watch in just about anything.  Even so, something about this movie isn’t pulling me in.  The trailer just doesn’t excite me and make me want to go spend $10 to see it.  As such, I’ll probably wait for Netflix.

The Chronicles of Narnia: The Voyage of the Dawn Treader: (official site)

Like many people, the Narnia stories were part of my growing up.  Not a huge part, mind you, because I only started reading the books a few times and never finished, but I do distinctly remember seeing some version of The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe on TV, either broadcast, HBO or VHS.  I digress… the point is, I was very excited to see the first film, and I loved it.  The second film, however, was lackluster at best.  It was… boring.  The trailer for this third installment looks a bit more exciting, but we’ll have to see if they have managed to avoid the pitfalls of the last film.  Then again, this book is more popular than the last, so there are probably more people wanting to see it.  If I do go to the theater, I’ll likely pass on seeing it in 3D.  To date, none of the films where the 3D is done in post production have impressed me.  The ones filmed with 3D cameras have been quite good, and of course animated films that are rendered in 3D work also.  However, post production 3D just looks like a cleaner version of the old 3D, where depth doesn’t feel like true depth, but instead like there are different layers of flatness, as if everything is moving cardboard cutouts positioned differing distances from the camera.  It ends up feeling like a gimmick rather than that the filmmakers felt that 3D was the best way to tell the story.  It distracts from the film instead of adding to it.  So, yeah… probably worth going to see, but in 2D to save the extra $3.

Tell Your Customers

We (don't) Care!
Don't let this be your motto!

Currently, I deal with two companies on a regular basis to whom which we pay a lot of money.  One of them, a co-location facility, is fantastic at communication.  Every time they have scheduled maintenance or even unplanned issues, I get an email.  In fact, I get several.  For a scheduled issue I get an announcement, a reminder, a notification of start, a progress update if the issue is long enough, more if the issue keeps going, a notification of resolution and an after action report.  For unscheduled issues it’s the same only without the lead time.  I even get these emails when the issue isn’t going to affect us, just so I know what is going on and on the off chance that is does end up affecting us.

The other, to whom we pay much more money and they handle out internet and phones, we get nothing.  Even when we have outages, getting an explanation from them is like pulling teeth.  Our internet access, which is needed for our customers to use our products, goes down for twenty minutes, or bounces up and down for several hours (down for 30 seconds, up for 3 minutes, down for 20 second, up for a minute, down for a minute, up for 5, etc..) and the best I get from them is “we’ll look into it”.

Having worked in the telecom industry, and from dealing with various companies over the years, I know that all this equipment is monitored and logged.  Someone, somewhere had to have gotten notification of the problem, so why didn’t they toss out an email that said, “Hey, we are seeing issues in XXX area and some of our customers may be affected. We are working on it!” and later a nice “We found the problem and it was resolved!”  I mean, shit, the co-location facility provides an after action report with more detail than I know what to do with…

The failure was in the 3rd card of the router in room 3E1 that caused packet loss to the network that exceeded the threshold and switched the room to its backup route at the same time room 3E2 was being fault tested which overloaded the network and crashed it.  Our customers in 3E2 were immediately switched to their primary route experiencing only a few seconds of outage but room 3E1 was offline for 63 seconds while the backup route was restarted.  The 3rd card of the router in 3E1 was replaced and the room was placed back on its primary route within one hour.  We have scheduled a replacement of parts of the backup route for tomorrow to ensure it doesn’t crash again when it is needed.  Next week we will begin a full equipment test of all routes that should take two weeks to complete to ensure this same issue doesn’t happen to the other rooms not affected at all by this issue.

All of this comes without me ever once having to call anyone.  Meanwhile, our telecom tells us:

We think there was an outage in XXX, which shouldn’t affect you but might have, and since your service is up now I’m going to close the ticket.

And this is after calling to open a ticket, waiting three hours, escalating through four levels of management and threatening to cancel our service and go with another provider.  I wish I could say that my threat was more than empty, but as I said, I used to work in telecom, and this is par for the course.  No matter who we switch to we’d get the same level of information about failures out of them.

Seriously guys… if there was a line out, or an equipment failure, or someone crossed a line or rebooted something they shouldn’t have, just admit it.  Tell me exactly what it is so that I understand that you actually know what happened, because your current level of non-communication only leads me to believe that you have no idea what happened.

This applies to just about every business in the world.  Admit fault, explain failure and detail resolution.  Even if it all goes over your customer’s head, you have at least demonstrated that you know what you are doing.  Hand waving and secrecy just makes your customers have less faith in your abilities.  If your team is competent, you should want to show it off.

And now it is too late…

Almost two months ago I wrote about the best show on TV that you weren’t watching, Terriers.  You were supposed to start watching, like, immediately.  But apparently, you didn’t.  And now they’ve gone and cancelled the show.

I hate procedurals.  They bore me, mostly because I want to know about the people solving the crimes, not the crimes so much themselves.  If I wanted to see crimes solved I’d read a newspaper or something.  What I want in my television are characters worth caring about, and most procedurals spend too much time on the science (half of which they make up anyway, or at least use in unrealistic budgetarily unconstrained ways) and not enough on the people.

Terriers was about people.  Sure, there were crimes.  Some of them were wrapped up in an episode, and some arced over several episodes.  But most the compelling part of the show was the people who were tangled up in the mess.  And ultimately, the core of the drama on Terriers was that it went to great lengths to illustrate that all actions have consequences.  Nothing in this show was wasted.  By the end of its run of just thirteen episodes, everything bore fruit, every action affected someone or something, every decision had consequences.

At this point, you’ve got a few options to see this gem in its entirety.  Head over to Amazon and buy it from video on demand, or get it from iTunes, or go find some less than legal avenue to download episodes… or wait for the DVD release, of which I hope it gets good treatment of extras and not just episodes on disc.

Of course, one of the biggest letdowns of the cancellation is that I won’t get to hear “Gunfight Epiphany” each week.  (Sadly, the song is only for sale on iTunes, and I hate iTunes.)

Just know… you could have saved this show.  But you didn’t.  And for that, I like you a little bit less today than I did yesterday.  I’ll get over it, but we lost one of the good ones here, and that’s on you.

A Week of Tweets on 2010-12-05

  • Anyone else playing Perpetuum? #
  • "Cheer up, Ed. This is not goodbye. It's just I won't ever see you again." #
  • If your browser has more than one 3rd party toolbar installed and no good reason for it, I officially ban you from the Internet. Good day. #
  • Started this year's Christmas short story last night. I'll tease you with the first line: "The Christmas tree finished eating Henry Wright." #
  • Homemade chicken pot pie. Delicious! Thank you, wife. #
  • The best part about the end of NaNoWriMo is that I can get back to reading. #
  • Still disabling Lexulous emails on Facebook daily, still getting the emails. One of you needs to admit fault and fit it. Stop buck passing. #
  • What is the point of a WYSIWYG tool if the tool applies not default styles by default? #
  • You are expecting an email and it doesn't come. Why do you suspect it was never sent BEFORE checking your spam/junk folder? #stupidpeople #
  • Damn you browsers! Why can't you all use the exact same standards?! #
  • @comcast Why are the prices on your website so different from what the people on the phone say? One of them is lying… #
  • Seriously? $82 a month for Internet Access, Comcast? Seriously? #iwishihadanalternative #nocompetitionblows #
  • Find a way, watch all 13 episodes of Terriers, then send an email to user@fxnetworks.com in support of a second season. #terriers #fx #
  • On Error Resume Next #

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Movie Round-Up: December 3rd, 2010

The Warrior's WayThe Warrior’s Way: (official site)

Next year the movies will be invaded by Cowboys & Aliens.  This year we get Cowboys & Ninjas.  This movie looks absolutely ridiculous, and that may be the thing that makes it a success.  I mean, the story is about a ninja assassin who is ordered to kill a baby that is the last member of a particular family.  He refuses and flees to America where he hides in a small town until the ninjas catch up with him to finish the job, kill the baby and kill him for his betrayal.  I highly doubt that I’ll go to the theater to see this movie, but it will make the top of my Netflix list because this movie must be seen.

The Round-Up posts are less fun when only one movie comes out.  Less photoshopping involved…

Dead Set

Dead SetSometimes when you buy stuff on Amazon, they give you some free money to use on their Video on Demand service.  Normally, I might not use it, but I managed to sock away enough of these at one time (the free money always has an expiration date) and used it to watch 2008’s Dead Set in the only way legal in the US.

Dead Set is a zombie horror mini-series that was produced for the BBC in England.  Beginning on eviction night of the popular Big Brother TV show, the outbreak happens and quickly spreads, leaving only scattered people and those safely locked inside the Big Brother house as survivors.  It is two and a half hours of fast paced zombie action that is a perfect juxtaposition to The Walking Dead currently airing on AMC.

I simply cannot recommend this series enough.  It was fantastic, although Romero purists might hate the faster moving zombies.  Absolutely worth seeing for any zombie fan.  Check it out if you haven’t seen it already.

Fifty Thousand Words

For the first time ever, I have won the NaNoWriMo.  By focusing on word counts over content, I was able to bang out over 50,000 words in 30 days…

… and I feel dirty.

In my time on this Earth I have written a number of things of which I am ashamed, but after the first fifteen thousand or so words this year’s WriMo project turned into the worst piece of shit I have ever created.  I will set it aside and sometime in January I might review it, and in all likelihood I’ll delete over 35,000 of those words and pretend they never existed.  And that’s if I can ever bring myself to review it, which I may not, because it really is a piece of shit.

Next year, I think I’ll go back to focusing on content and return to my previous years of losing with style.  I’ve never felt so poorly about winning in my entire life.

The TSA

I don’t usually talk politics and such on here, but I feel I need to put a few things out there…

First off, lets go ahead and get the bit about people who trade liberty for security deserving neither.  I believe that.  If we have to live in fear, like slaves, to a huge machine of rules and regulations then the terrorists have won.

Second, to all the people who are supporting the TSA and their new scanners and pat downs with the defense of “We need to prevent another 9/11” … you are disgracing the memory of those who died.  Want to prevent another 9/11?  One, make the cockpit door stronger to the point where it cannot be battered down, and any explosive strong enough to open the door will also damage the plane enough that getting inside the cockpit is useless.  Two, a new policy where the pilots enter the plane first, close and lock the door, and they don’t open it unless one of the cockpit crew is in medical distress.  In future plane designs/redesigns, give them their own bathroom and a place to store a meal so that they don’t need to leave nor does anyone need to come in.  Done.  If terrorists cannot get into a functional cockpit, they cannot use the plane as a weapon and you have prevented another 9/11.  No amount of confiscation of nail clippers and water bottles and junk touching pat downs will prevent another 9/11.  Did you know that a properly folded copy of the Sky Mall magazine can be used as a weapon?

It’s all security theater, and if it makes you feel safer then you don’t understand what is going on.  Mostly though, as with many things, this is about money.  By mandating that every airport needs to have these new scanners they guarantee sales of the scanners.  The enhanced pat down exists mainly to make using the scanner feel like the better option, and they released these new regulations during the holiday season because they knew people would put up less of a fight if fighting meant missing a flight home for turkey and pumpkin pie.  And if you want to avoid all this drama and just skip flying… you are much much more likely to be killed in a car accident than you are to be killed by terrorists on a plane even without the new enhanced security.

I guess what I’m saying is… take the train.  I also hear that trans-Atlantic cruises are nice.

A Week of Tweets on 2010-11-28

  • It's not how many times you get knocked down. It's how many times you get back up. #
  • Get up! (Get on up!) #
  • Is today over yet? #
  • @massively I'd love to comment on the new design, but I can't login since the change. It appears to work, but I remain logged out. #
  • If I can't see content on your site without paging down, the best you'll get is an RSS subscription so I don't have to see your site. #
  • @grimthorn He was simply employing the new Extra Enhanced Pat Down Procedure. in reply to grimthorn #
  • Remember, the Blob can't stand cold. #
  • … and Kevin Dillon. The Blob also can't stand Kevin Dillon. #
  • Hey Wednesday. Thanks for the flat tire. Now, cut that shit out. I mean it. #
  • I should stop planning to get out of debt. Each time I do, life smacks me with more unexpected bills. #
  • I need the names of apocalyptic movies that happen during the Christmas season… go! #
  • Caught a ride with a trickster and a javelin man to a town down by the sea… #
  • I hate that we live in a world where spam continues because it works. *sigh* Please, stop clicking on the links they send you. #
  • the AC in my car stopped working. On the bright side, the heater started working. #putofftilspring #
  • people already lined up outside Best Buy for Black Friday. Insanity. #betterdealsonline #
  • turkey, ham, corn, peas, rice, broccoli, rolls, jello, cookies, pound cake… all in my belly. #happythanksgiving #

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Movie Round-Up: November 24th, 2010

Tangled Burlesque Love and Other Faster DrugsUsually the Movie Round-Up in on Friday, but due to the holiday here in the US everything is opening on Wednesday.

Burlesque: (offical site)

I’ll admit to a desire to see this film.  Long, long ago two girls came out of the Disney music factory around the same time. Britney Spears and Christina Aguilera. While many folks hitched their trailers to Ms. Spears, I always felt that Ms. Aguilera was the better talent. Today, with Britney a train wreck and Christina only having hit a few bumps, I’d say I was right. More than that, though, this movie has Kristen Bell and Stanley Tucci, and a slew of other fine folks.  However, I won’t be seeing this in the theater, as I’ve offered to let the wife and a few other ladies have a night out without the boys, while us boys are on baby sitting duty. So, Burlesque, I’ll see you on Netflix.

Faster: (official site)

You won’t find me waiting in line for this movie this week. Sure, it looks like fun. Dwayne Johnson is playing a bad-ass out for revenge, and the film looks filled to the brim with other recognizable faces. But I’ve watched the trailer a handful of times and its hook just isn’t reeling me in. I’m sure I’ll see it someday, but not anytime soon.

Tangled: (official site)

If I had kids of an appropriate age, I’d be seeing this. It looks funny, and Disney has a pretty good record with its kid oriented movies. As with the two films above, I’m sure I’ll see this at some point, but not this week.

Love and Other Drugs: (official site)

Oddly enough, the movie with the most pull for me this week, the one I’d most likely go to see in the theater, happens to be the one I’ve already seen.  Like, months ago.  This movie is two stories wrapped in one.  On one side you have Jake Gyllenhaal as Jamie, a guy trying to figure himself out and doing so as a pharmaceutical salesman.  On the other you have him and Anne Hathaway as Maggie, and the relationship between them.  The two stories intertwine as his career launches and they both deal with her Parkinson’s and how it affects their feelings.  I went into this film thinking it was just going to be another throwaway romantic comedy.  The trailers I had seen sure made it to be that way, with Jamie selling Viagra and little clips of the two of them meeting for sex.  But the actual film has a whole lot more heart than that.  It is funny, but it’s also smart and sexy.  I’d recommend it to just about any couple looking for a good date movie.  Not a first date, or even an early one.  But perhaps if you are the sort of person who needs to shift things around or get a sitter to have a date night with your significant other, then you should do so to go see this movie.  Well worth the price of admission.